Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Got Your Posse?


“Come here and let me hug your neck!” she said to me. As I leaned down to hug this wonderful, Godly, woman, she held on tight, put her lips to my ear and said, “I love you, I love you, I love you… so much! Thank you for being a friend.”

As I hugged her back, told her that I loved her too, and started to lean away, she held onto my hand so that I would look her in the eye. “A real friend,” she added. My heart melted. I told her that I knew what a real friend was, because I had had friends over the years who stated that… yet were not. She agreed.

As I walked away, I took with me such a sense of joy. Someone considered me a real friend! Of course, I felt her to be a real friend as well, along with a scant few others. Then I realized: I have a Posse!

Picture ©123rf.com Text ©shelleywilburn.org
It may sound so grade school, or even junior high. But how important do you suppose it is to women to have their Posse? Women whom you can go to in times of distress, whom you can confide in, who will have your back when the chips are down, who will pray with you, for you, and for anyone else you ask them to. Your Posse.

Women need the companionship, fellowship, friendship, and relationship of other women in their lives. When they don’t have that, they begin to shift their needs to others who may not be able, or willing, to give them the things they need. I know. For many, many years I did not have that nurturing, caring, group of women (my Posse) in my life. So it fell to my husband to try to understand. And he did the best he could, yet it put a strain on him, and on our relationship.

A woman needs to hear, “I understand,” from another woman who has been there. Someone who has walked down that path, through that fire, that moment in time, and come out the other side a better, more experienced person.

These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God.” ~Titus 2:3-5 NLT (emphasis mine)

Your Posse can be as little as one or two others, or as many as a dozen or more others. Regardless of the number, the important thing about your Posse is that they keep you grounded, point you toward and keep you rooted in your faith in Christ. They stand with you in prayer. They laugh with you. They cry with you. They help you understand when you’re wrong, yet they rejoice with you when you’re right. They don’t control, manipulate, or drag you into the trenches. They build you up. Your Posse are your “go-to girls” for everything from prayer, to laughter, to a shoulder to cry on, or even just a listening ear, or a companionable silence. Just knowing that the support is there is enough sometimes.

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: if one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up." ~Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (emphasis mine)

It’s good to know that you have support. My posse came as the result of a gift from the Lord. For many years, I shunned getting to know other women because in the past, women had caused me deep hurt. They had been my oppressors and intimidators. But after God healed that brokenness within me, He began to place one Godly woman, then another, then another in my path. Before long, I found myself reaching out to a certain few for prayer… and they came through. My Posse. I fell (or thought I had) and they helped me up. They understood. They never criticized, berated, or made me feel inferior. Instead, they put themselves alongside me and walked right along with me. They built me up and helped me to see that I was still on the path, but just needed reassurance.

I hope you have a Posse. If you don’t, ask the Lord to show you some Godly women whom you can trust. Ask Him to show you some women who will be good for you and good to you. He will send them. Just trust Him and wait. It won't take long.

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